A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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