I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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