you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
