your thong is hanging out like whoa
he was CRYING into my vagina
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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