when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize