Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize