Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
