Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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