Kiss
Puke
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
They are going to name an STD after you.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
