i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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