were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
