so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
