ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
