you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
