I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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