he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
