So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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