with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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