Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
