anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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