We should be called the Road Head Warriors
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
