You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Randomize
