I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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