We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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