Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
