My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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