we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Randomize
