Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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