Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize