My liver just broke up with me...
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
This is my gift to your gina
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
