I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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