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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
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