So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize