Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
