The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
