And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
