Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize