FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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