I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
