the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
