If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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