I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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