i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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