i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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