She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize