I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you win again, gameday.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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