toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
