I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Randomize
