Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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