do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
someone threw a dead crab at me
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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